• Lady Isabel Ivy


I injured My wrist over the weekend, unfortunately, which means no heavy play for a week, while I give it the care and attention it needs to heal. It got Me thinking about another form of attention in the BDSM community: aftercare. Specially the role it plays in My sessions and My style as a Dominatrix.

Aftercare is very important to Me. I like to go heavy in My scenes. Anyone who's sessioned with Me knows this. However, to Me, it’s still a game and it’s one W/we play together. You hand over the reigns and I take you to the deepest recess of your mind while pushing you to your physical limits during our allotted time together. The healing in BDSM (for Me at least) comes from the fact that no matter how dark or deep the scene is, how real the pain and emotional experience is, W/we both know W/we’re safe thanks to pre-negotiated boundaries and safe words. I also add aftercare to that category of “safeness” because it’s that moment of mutual recognition of a shared experience and O/our own humanity. It’s also that moment to say “I see you, you’re safe, thank you.” That’s why I never skip it, ever. For some clients, that’s a put off, wanting to squish in all they can into the allotted amount of time before rushing out the door. And to them I say, God bless, but I’m not the Domme for you. To the rest, I say, let’s go there, knowing that I will always hold space for your reactions afterwards. It’s part of our culture and it’s part of My job and I wouldn’t change it for the world. Looking forward to playing again with you soon... ❤️ Lady Isabel

*Photo of aftercare with the beautiful @coyotefawn2. Compassionately shot by the immensely talented @markdektor_photography. I want to tell the story now, but it will have to wait for another day ;)

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